I have all the words that have gone missing to say that I am thankful for being in the August 2021 run of Poem-A-Day at poets.org as guest edited by Kazim Ali
Read the poem here
about the poem:
“I can't speak for all fathers, but my own fathering is littered with necessary and fake finalities. As such, I wrote this poem by hand on a small piece of paper while worrying about the long and short lives of my children. In the spacing of the poem, I tried to honor the little room I'd given myself for its projected concerns.”
I have put rocks
through frogs
for sounding out
the patience
of my fear
How early I was
to my terrible angel
I would not mark myself
as wild, I would
bless the underbite, then hosanna
my bottom teeth
into the roof of my mouth
They put a light
made of light
in there
but I couldn’t
fill a ghost
Each toothache
around this time
slept longer
than god
I was eye and passed away mouth
A close friend blew his hand off
trying to call
his mother
No vision awaits our seeing
In prose there is no instant miracle. My son is yet alive. Not every angel in heaven knows about the world. The ones that do have stomachs. Eating disorders cure magic. Put a snake’s egg under the shirt of your most boythinking doll. Piano: fingers asleep on the stitched-up skin of god. A number of my sadnesses have disappeared. My hair that way.
An angel will kill a baby and tell you your imagery is missing the missing. The fish in my stomach say to my stomach that fish are made of blood. I am nearing the end of being happy. Hindsight: God saw your face and slept. Meetingplace: ghosts form a circle around the spider of distance. Pass away, mouth.
in doll
years
I am eating the face of god in a dream I won't finish. Impulsively remote, the mirror. Look at me when I'm drinking.
I have a sound for each of my children who weren't around when I was loved by my mom.
Touch is an exiled portal that keeps abuse from having a past.
You can't take time with you.
Congrats to Darren C Demaree who was named an Ohio Book Award Finalist in Poetry for his collection Now Flourish Northern Cardinal: Selected Poems, 2005-2025 (Small Harbor Publishing 2025)
Please go here and vote for this absolutely moving and stilling work.
I had words for the collection here. I still have them, and keep having.
On that Ohio note, in that Ohio song, in the hearkening of seeing today the trailer for Union County, a drama starring Will Poulter, Noah Centineo, Emily Meade, and Sylvie Mix, and its addressment of the opioid crisis in Ohio, in the where of all, please also check out Demaree's Two Towns Over, which says things in the before and after of the only present. Had words for it as well, as such, below:
Nobody tosses
out the drugs
of the dead.
That’s not how
this works. – {from} Monroe Mills, Ohio
Darren C. Demaree, in his book Two Towns Over, blesses a cursed Ohio with a populace whose touch is fighting an infection.
I know this Ohio…I know what it’s like to step over the shadow of one’s ghost…to lay low so as to give death nothing to leap from. To jump rope in hell. Demaree points to places made for map that have instead gone on to shoulder nowhere, from bunk bed to basement, looking to be housed.
Each entry, each poem, is an abruption, an angry rendering of those hypnotic recognitions that ask the present for the past and the past for the present that there may be a future locating of the hiccup lost to the moan of exile.
The title alone howls a human proximity over the work’s body to which ash is the salt of context. What is the purpose of show and tell if it is merely a prop for cause and effect, and why dream if even those in the mirage are thirsty? Answer is an act, and the writing here allows inquiry its melancholy passage through the museums of the ahistoric and positions itself as a headlight in the gut of any cyclops livestreaming the ideas dangled below the drowned. There are churches, here, and drugs. But there is no here here. Eternity has left to play the long game and most congregate as an avoidance raised on erasure.
I grew up in Ohio on what I called with my brothers a farm but what was really the shell of a farm. No animals, and noiseless machines towering above the broken and statuesque. We would joke that we were the only farm boys in Ohio who couldn’t use their hands. All jokes are serious, and no one is alone.
To hold this book, with its odes to the corners of drug houses, its sweet wolves, and its towns skipped over by sameness, is to return the clay its handmade hope. And to realize, that to be correctly dead, one must have belongings.
It was not a full life
That’s what I want
you to say
I thought birds
were choking
I wasn’t
young
Also
when you get here
who was there
to hear
Despair is a stone with teeth. Useless, but I prefer it.
Hope has name after name for the insides of hope.
Or maybe despair is a stone with no teeth. That’s here all night.
My son dies and my card gets charged three times. I am stunned by no single thing. When I read I read so little under the star of my drinking that touch becomes the lost ambassador of a body I can draw from memory. I can’t imagine my brothers being loved. I can’t imagine my brothers being loved on the same day. I hate how I sit in chairs in my dad’s house. My mom says I write to hurt. My son's stomach is a shape he forgets devouring. In the angel’s ear, plastic is the voice of god.

